Make that change
Posted by Simon Parke, 06 December 2017, 6.08am
‘Make that change’ sang Michael Jackson.
But it isn’t easy.
Transitions from one place to another place are hard.
They are hard even if we want to reach the new place.
It may, for instance, be difficult to get out of bed on a cold December morning - even if we know we must and that we’ll enjoy the day when we do.
The warm bed has the stronger pull.
And the problem can be more serious.
I spoke recently to an angry man - angry with his company for not mentoring him better, for not offering him leadership roles.
Though when we pondered his work practice, we noted he refused to change the way he worked, even though it would be better if he did.
And it was the simplest of changes as well, involving time-management - how he used the different parts of the day.
I proposed some people techniques for re-ordering his day; but the sense was, they’d be to no avail.
Will trumps technique every time.
He could see what he needed to do…but couldn’t or wouldn’t do it.
(He even blamed self-help books for not helping him.)
Transitions are difficult, even if we want to get there.
They’re difficult, because we don’t want to leave the old place.
So we get angry with others instead…
The Promised land is a few steps away…but to take those steps appears quite impossible.
Transitions are difficult.
I feel helpless in the face of my own issues, just as I do in the face of other’s.
I feel the restrictive force of my own frightened personality, still in the thrall of some out-dated egoic nonsense, set against all forms of growth.
But I hear also a different song inside, calling me on.
And it’s a good song.
And while I live in a cage, I see also the sky, and in moments, many moments, quite leave the cage behind and know only the sky.
Here are three thoughts for those facing difficult transition.
1) Be kind to yourself. (Your ego served you once; it’s not surprising it still holds power.)
2) Seek correct diagnosis of your situation, what you’re doing and why. (This may mean no longer blaming others.)
3) Ponder what you want from ‘this one precious life’...what do you wish for? And what will you do to get there?
1) And be kind to yourself.